Thursday, October 25, 2007

Henry Waxman is a Ghoul--NEWSFLASH!

In an interview today, Mr. Waxman (D-California) acknowledged that he was, in fact, a ghoul. This was in response to rumors that Waxman was, variously, a vampire, a poltergeist, and alien from Roswell, a Wereworlf, and a phantasm. "I just wanted to set the record straight," said Waxman, who earlier in the day had been ruthlessly grilling Secretary Rice (one of this author's heroes) over her "mistakes" in conducting the Iraq War. A ghoul, of course, is a tangible being, generally a corpse ressurected by an evil spirit. It is thus not very comely, but since so many fell creatures ARE uncomely, there was some dispute about what type of fell beast he was, although it was generally agreed that his fearsome visage could not be 100% human. Goblin/Orc ancestry was also suggested.

The Anti-Defamation League of California issued a statement saying it would pursue legal action against anyone who called Waxman's ability to serve his constituents into question. "It's not like he killed anybody," said a representative of the League, "Anyone who says that His Highness Representative Waxman (may he live forever) is unable to serve is just a poophead."

Messages left at Waxman's House office as well as his Santa Clarita Fell Fortress were not returned.

AP News, 10-25-07

6 Comments:

Your Conscience said...

i thought he is was ghoul... but the slime oozing from his armpits suggests otherwise. but i agree with you totally, as usual;)

sweetggirl said...

Santa Clarita! That's where I wanna go to college! OOooooooo,LOL

Your Conscience said...

oops... that "IS" in the last comment is not supposed to be there... oops

Sola Gratia said...

Well, you'll have some pretty weird neighbors, Rachel ;)

elisabeth said...

Does he really think he is a ghoul or is this all a joke? I am kinda blond

Your Conscience said...

he doesnt really think he is a ghoul... at least i dont think so... ? ...but yea, its all a joke... i think... lol